The magic of publishing at 11:31

Saving the world with meals on wheels. You've swallowed a planet! They're not aliens, they're Earth…liens! Heh-haa! Super squeaky bum time! No, I'll fix it. I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor. Don't call me the Rotmeister.

No, I'll fix it. I'm good at fixing rot. Call me the Rotmeister. No, I'm the Doctor. Don't call me the Rotmeister. Did I mention we have comfy chairs? Sorry, checking all the water in this area; there's an escaped fish.

It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool. It's art! A statement on modern society, 'Oh Ain't Modern Society Awful?'! I'm the Doctor, I'm worse than everyone's aunt. *catches himself* And that is not how I'm introducing myself.

You hate me; you want to kill me! Well, go on! Kill me! KILL ME! Annihilate? No. No violence. I won't stand for it. Not now, not ever, do you understand me?! I'm the Doctor, the Oncoming Storm - and you basically meant beat them in a football match, didn't you?